Venting
Get it out - let it go - get freed up!
Purpose
The purpose of venting is to get something out, to really be finished with something so you can let go of it. The purpose is not to complain or have someone agree with what you are venting about. You can use venting when something is festering within, or something is bothering you. Venting is a confidential time that is never to be disclosed.
Guidelines
- Vent in a contained space, away from other people. Find the right place.
- Carefully choose a venting partner. Someone who is mature enough and who you can trust to hear what you have to say without taking sides and / or being personally affected by what you have to say. As possible, use the same venting partner.
- Don’t vent about the person you are venting to.
- Have respect for the person you are venting with and ask their permission before you begin to vent so they can prepare themselves to be with you and receive your venting. Declare that you are venting and don’t just start spewing and then, after wards say you were venting.
- Before you start have a clear intent to want to let go and change.
- Vent for a stated specific period of time, like 5 minutes. Have the desire to have a change happen by the time you are done venting.
- Be clear when you are done venting, and say something like “I’m through with venting”.
- After you are done venting you can give equal time speaking truth and
what you are finding. This can help you get more strongly situated in
the truth.
If you are the one receiving the venting, listen
openly without judgment. Hear it as venting. Don’t give feedback at this
time. Once the venting is officially complete, the person may ask you
to give feedback to them for a few minutes and that would be fine. You
are not there to fix or solve anything for the person venting.
You
can also vent on a piece of paper rather than talk to someone. You
write, and when you are done, you throw the paper in the trash with the
intent to let go and change. The next day, if there is more, you can
write more.
You vent when something is pestering you. You vent because you think it will help you make a change.
At
the end of the venting session you are either done with it, and / or
you will have to move some feelings, and / or you are clear about some
actions to take or changes to make.
Whatever you do, have your venting move something that was in the way of you going forward.
