Posted by: Rose Tol, R&I Life Coaching, April 6, 2013 Emotional Health in Relationships
Emotional health is defined by the degree to which you are in control of your thoughts, feelings and emotions and behaviors. This is the result of deep inner work that you have done on yourself where you bring out into the light the feelings and emotions that have been repressed or pushed into denial over the years. This type of inner work has a person become aware that they are not their feelings. They are the one that is experiencing and observing the feelings. An emotional healthy person feels confident, has a good self esteem and has good relationships.
These are the characteristics of people with good emotional health:
Any action we take towards emotional health has a direct positive impact
on the quality of our physical health, and how well we age.
There are ways to improve your emotional health.
Just as it is important to recognize when your body is not healthy so that the help can be given at the right time, so it is important to recognize and unhealthy emotional state.
Unfortunately most people are uncomfortable with their own feelings and emotions. Most people judge, belittle, dramatize, make fun of and criticize their own feelings and emotions. If people do this with themselves you most certainly can count on it that they do it to you too.
We did not grow up learning how to be with our emotions in a way that is without criticism and judgments. Anger is a great example, anger is bad and you are a bad person if you feel it.
So during our childhood years so many feelings get suppressed or even worse, they go into the denial. This is where the problems in the world start. Suppressed and denied feelings and emotions result in people abusing and hurting themselves and others even to the point of picking up a gun and shooting children and teachers in school.
The following are characteristics of people with an unhealthy emotional state:
The following are RED FLAG feelings and behaviors that may require immediate professional attention!
If you identify with any of these red flag symptoms, consider making an appointment with a mental health professional.
If you are realizing that your are not as emotionally healthy as you'd like to be,
here's the good news: just as you can improve your physical fitness by
working at it, you can improve your emotional fitness, too.
Direction for your inner work:
It takes time and commitment to do the inner work to build emotional health, but the rewards are huge. The more you do your inner work on freeing your emotions, the better you'll feel.
The following questions can help you with your inner work. Start to identify if there are things about you or inside of you that need your attention;
If your asking is sincere you will start to receive information in which direction to go.
If it is difficult for you to see maybe you like to ask the people around you what they think the answers are.
Judgments is a big obstacle towards feeling, recognizing, understanding and accepting your emotions. You have to stand up to the the inner critic so that your inner work toward and increase of emotional health can pay off.
Another way to look at this is to become aware of your basic human needs. What are you 6 basic human needs.
Are your needs being met? Ar you fulfilling any of your basic human
needs in a negative way. Studying your human needs can reveal a lot
about your feelings and emotions.
You want to become a master at feelings your feelings and emotions. You want to learn to recognize and understand them. Find what they are communicating and let them just wash through you. Remember you are not feelings. And this is a very advanced stage to get to. But you can start today and before you know it you will start to understand.
You might also be interested in learning a meditation practice that includes the emotions and feelings.
We are offering a meditation practice here at R&I Life Coaching that address the mind, body and soul. It addresses your feelings and emotions by connecting you to your inner longing for truth, love and light. Whatever feelings and emotions there are that need acceptance, healing and understanding will naturally come to the surface for you then to address in the right timing. It is bringing all what is suppressed and denied into the light. It is a most beautiful journey of opening the mind, heart and body to the light and love which is your true essence.
You can read more about this meditation on: The GMP Meditation or you can try this GMP Meditation in the Meditation Room.
We are living in a world with close to 7 billion people. We humans are social creatures and we crave companionship and connection. We are not meant to thrive and survive in isolation. One the most powerful things you can have in your life is a friend or companion that has a good listening ear. A friend you can trust to have your good at heart. Sharing yourself with a friend like that can help you open up your heart and mind at a fast rate. When we feel safe, understood and loved, we are able to gain easier access to denied and suppressed feelings and emotions.
How do we find that friend with a listening ear? Be a great friend and listener yourself. This way you can develop a friendship and listento each other and help each other.